expiation inbox.

[gravity_flares]

INBOX ↳ [TEXT] [AUDIO] [VIDEO] [ACTION] "Wherever you hide, there’s no escaping gravity~." code credit

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Action - Recruiting for the Fedora Appreciators Club!

[starstrailblaze]

Hey there friend! I am absolutely not soliciting your doorstep, but I want you to know that you have a very cool fedora. Would you be interested in joining the Fedora Appreciators Club? It's also known as the Fedora Haters Haters club as well because we hate people with bad tastes. As of currently right now, we have one member.

Members get a cool Pom-Pom sticker upon joining, so what do you say? I'm Caelus by the way.

??????

[gravity_flares]

[He thinks this is a joke, at first. Who wouldn't with THAT kinda pitch? But he'll bite. It's not every day someone compliments his hat so, he just can't help himself. He's practically glowing with the grin he casts this little pitcher. Finally! Someone with good tastes.]

Ha, you really think so? Thanks!

SoーCaelus, was itー beside getting whatever a "Pom-Pom" sticker is, what else is there to all this? Sounds to me like someone must've really gotten on your ass about your own fedora?

[Speaking of, let's see it already!]

Same hat? Same hat.

[starstrailblaze]

[ He takes out the Watchmaker's Legacy. It's been through quite a history, but it's as stylish and fancy as ever. Pretty impressive, huh? Mikhail Char Legwork would be proud of him. ]

Besides appreciating fedoras, we antagonize fedora haters back. Like that one guy I just met the other week who said mine reminded him of this slimy short slug? I'm absolutely offended.

[ That guy also mentioned the name in passing too too but Caelus is trying to remember it... ]

Same hat chronicles of the slug and the base baller!

[gravity_flares]

[The way he admires that hat. There's a certain glimmer in those dark eyes that speaks of yearning. The urge to ask to hold it and look it over. He would, too, if not for this "one guy" being mentioned.

There's no way this isn't Dazai's usual antics. Just thinking about that bastard changes everything. That cool, classy composure he touts around is out the window in a blink. He's all tension and aggression. A rumble caught up in his throat to back up that there's familiarity with "that guy" and the very exchange Caelus experiences. ]

Rrrrr... do I look like a slimy short slug to you?!

[With it comes a stance. A pose. An intention to pull himself up to stand as tall as humanly possible and to throw his hand out alongside it in dramatic flare. He'll show that canned mackerel a thing or two. Now, if he'd just stop getting ahead of himself!]

and this is where they strike a mutual friendship of being a nuisance to Dazai

[starstrailblaze]

[ He backs off just a little bit at Chuuya's sudden outburst, absolutely stunned and confused. He places his hands up defensively. ]


It wasn't me who said it! I think that guy's name was Dazai or something? He just couldn't stop talking about you and how my fedora reminded him of yours. Toxic yaoi much?

video; un: misscoordinator

[coordinatroll]

[ The video opens to Mitama, though just like in her recent post, she's wearing her "Santa disguise". She's here on an important business, after all. ]

Ho, ho, ho! Thank you for joining our Secret Santa event~ It's time to find out what ─ or rather who ─ your assignment as Santa's Little Helper for this year is! Drumroll, please...

[ She makes a pause for a dramatic effect, her hand slipping into a Santa hat she's holding and pulling out a small piece of paper with a name on it. ]

It's none other than... Koharu, the angel of love!

Remember, you should present your assignee with a gift of your choice until December 25th! Good luck, and remember: your main task is to spread joy, happiness and the spirit of Christmas cheer!

Miss Santa Coordinator, out!

when he gets this out of his system.

[gravity_flares]

That damn Dazai...!

[Give him a second. He's trying to calm down, but even saying that bastard's name leaves little to be desired with an already ruined mood.]

Can't shut up about me or even distinguish the differences from one hat to the other?! Tch! Our hats aren't that much alike, and he had to bother you for it?!

Looks like even here he can't cut this shit out...

[As if Chuuya never ever speaks of Dazai when he's not around at all. Toxic Yaoi is right!]

god i hate caelus

[starstrailblaze]

This is why we need to form the Fedora Haters Club and expand the network to counteract with this force. This Dazai guy is a menace to people with nice-looking fedoras and tastes. Down with Dazai.

[ Despite his neutral expression, Caelus is absolutely serious about this club. Fedoras ftw. ]

Action - birthday times

[emotionalbeast]

[It’s karaoke time. Akutagawa is hammered at this point. How he reached to this state is unknown to him. Perhaps he was trying to out drink Chuuya. He thought he could handle it, but in reality… it only took 3 drinks. Maybe two… long as the alcohol wasn’t that strong.

But hey, he’s swaying while sitting down as Chuuya is singing, at the peak of calling it a night. No, he can’t. Not yet. Because what happens next—-]

Heeeyyyyy. Tiny Fedora. [Akutagawa’s voice is slurred.] I hurt hiiiiiim.

[Yeah, this conversation comes out of the blue. Enjoy.]

cw: alcohol - this is going about as well as it could!

[gravity_flares]

[Chuuya isn't far behind. Everyone back home knows he's never had a tolerance for alcohol. They also know he's never let it stop him from having a "good time"! Not that he ever remembers. It's always a recollection by word of mouth, always an embarrassment, and yet... heavy is the sound of thick glass being set too hard upon a wooden surface. The slap of the flat of a gloved hand quickly follows.]

I told ya, don't call me... HIC. Haaaa?

[His head lifts, cheeks flush and words an equal slur. It's a wonder they can even understand one another. He's about to lay into him, but not when he spills that little tidbit out in a drunken wilt. Clearly, the birthday boy is going through it, so, naturally, the best way to handle it is...to pour him another glass from their shared bottle. Clearly!]

Did. Didーthey, y'know, deserve it?

[emotionalbeast]

[Akutagawa watches Chuuya pours another into his glass quietly, almost contemplating at the glass. A second later, he picks up the filled glass and chugs it half way.

It’s a horrible idea, he knows this. Yet, the burning sensation traveling down his throat hurt, but he refuse to let it stop him. His glass slams down as well, not as bad as Chuuya’s, inhaling a deep breath, and out. His face flushed as his head began to sink lower until his chin rest on top of the counter.]

I don’t.. know.

[How the hell can that man drink this much and remain standing?]

He.. he was- HIC bad. So I took his arm.

[gravity_flares]

[It's simple, really. As long as there's an unemptied bottle to enjoy, Chuuya isn't going to
stop indulging. Pairing that with someone who won't call it quits, either is bound to be disastrous. If only because neither know when to call it quits. Even a near miss in pouring his own drink won't deter him. He's gotta keep up
with this guy, after all. Competitive and rash until the end.]

Damn! I can't believe you got his arm and you're sulkinnng about it?? I'd be...HIC celebrating if I got that damn Dazai's arm..! [He thinks so, at least.]

Wha--, did you make a real mess of it or something?

[He reaches out, grossly misjudges the distance between them in an attempt to slap this Aku on the back to drive the point home. Celebrate! That's the thing to do when you get even with someone. As long as it doesn't cause a huge mess for others, why feel guilty about it?]

[emotionalbeast]

Huuuuhhh.

[Chuuya’s face is met with a dumbfounded expression. It was more like a twist, it’s hard to tell whether he was lost with words, shocked, or surprised, or all together. Akutagawa’s onyx eyes stared, as if through Chuuya, leaning in further. Since when was Chuuya so distant? It’s the alcohol.]

You want your bosses arm? Freak.

[Maybe its a PM thing. He takes another swing, his face is burning.]

Naw, it grows back. Jerry still didn’t like it.

[And his head begins to hang forward.]

Text; un: here4info

[emotionalbeast]

BODY SLAMS POST.

Text; un: sheepsongs

[gravity_flares]

you got any idea what time it is??

[emotionalbeast]

I don’t intend to wait until sunrise. And youre awake.

[gravity_flares]

you know, i CAN leave you on read until sunrise if i wanted to.

[emotionalbeast]

5 minutes.
I’m curious about myself.
The other Akutagawa.
And your world.

[gravity_flares]

[He almost throws his tablet out the window. Almost. He doesn't want to humor this shit. Not after what he learns from that shitty tiger!]

and what do i get outta it beside a guaranteed headache?

[emotionalbeast]

A favor. Will that suffice? Or maybe a story from my world.

[Or a beating. Not like Chuuya gave him reason to doubt, yet.]

[gravity_flares]

fine. you'll owe me a favor.

well, go on, shoot.

[Please, the only thing that's gonna be beat is your ass if you try it, Aku!!]

[emotionalbeast]

Describe me the other Akutagawa?
Your world?
About you?

[gravity_flares]

ugh, let's start with the first one, i guess.

the Akutagawa from my world was one of my comrades in the Port Mafia. from what i can tell, you're both pretty similar aside from that. a little bit of a pain in my ass, sure, but...

[he respects him. not that you're gonna hear him say that!]

anyway, i'd say one of the major differences between you two is the way you dress. plus you aren't obsessed with getting that damn Dazai's recognition despite your own capabilities. i take it he didn't get you wrapped up in the mafia because of that?

[emotionalbeast]

[‘recognition’. Now he wants to cut his other self.]

Do me a favor. When you see him again, hit him for me.

That Man in Black went with his other choice because of the beast lurking inside me. It lead to 4 years vengeance, my sole purpose to kill that man. I’m still trying to wrap my mind around that guy.

[Forever the Man in Black]

[gravity_flares]

look, the bastard in black went with another choice for more than just that, probably. if he's anything like the one i know, it's never simple with that jackass.

not that my input matters much since the one you're dealing with now is from my world. he's already being a pain in the ass with his schemes, too.

tch, just thinkin' of that pisses me off!

[emotionalbeast]

you mean he’s acting on behalf of the man in black for Jinko. It’s perhaps more than that, i can’t say.

no matter the choice, his main goal was for me to meet with Jinko. Then he goes and takes his own life.

1/2

[gravity_flares]

[Whatever he's going to reply with never makes it to text. Because he drops his tablet. Doesn't pick it up for a long while, and when he does he has to read it all over again. Dammit. DAMMIT!]

what do you mean, he took his own life

2/2

[gravity_flares]

[No. No. He doesn't have to think about it. Doesn't have toー CRACK. The edge of his tablet screen flickers as the corner of it cracks. He's pressing too hard on it without realizing it. Shit.]

don't answer that, coattails.

[emotionalbeast]

[Dont answer that? Better move on to something else…]

let’s talk about you.

[gravity_flares]

[Yeah, thanks. He'll figure that part out later. Maybe. Only because a certain idiot is trying to play the role of this bastard.]

fine. what about me. i'm one of the executives in the Port Mafia. but my boss isn't the bastard in blackー i'm only gonna answer to Mori Ōgai.

[emotionalbeast]

[…he really won’t if Mori dies. Tucks that thought away.]

what made you join the port mafia? Do you owe your boss something?

[gravity_flares]

the promise of long walks on the beach and all the wine a guy could ask forー why the hell do you wanna know that specifically????

[That's too personal, coattails.]

[emotionalbeast]

ah now i understand.

[gravity_flares]

you gonna elaborate on that?

[emotionalbeast]

a peaceful slumber finally caught up to me.

[That’s a no.]

@&$#!!!

[gravity_flares]

now you're spoutin' cryptic shit outta the blue to get outta it?! just admit you don't understand like a normal person when they get caught, dammit!

[emotionalbeast]

if these arms could reach through the screen. It’s a metaphor. The conversation fell short like your personality. I dont know why i even bother reaching out when its all the same.

[gravity_flares]

tch...you know there's some things you just don't ask over text, right?

no? well, you wanna bother "reaching out", you do that shit in person. then i'll think about it.

but, just so you knowー i don't owe the Boss anything. not anymore.

[emotionalbeast]

Last thing, and I’ll stop.

His relationship with his sister. How is it?

[gravity_flares]

uh, it's good, i guess...? can't say i have the best experience when it comes to knowing how siblings should act.

all i know is he meets up with her from time to time when they're both off duty. they're pretty private, so it's not like i've tried to follow up past that, anyway.

[emotionalbeast]

[Good thing this is text. Their relationship is better.]

Thank you for your time Short Fedora. Night.

[gravity_flares]

i told you to quit callin' me that already!

whatever.
you're welcome.
night.